Category: A Better You

Posted in A Better You, Uncategorized

Progress Doesn’t Just Happen

Posted on by melissaburgess

Sometimes, when I get writer’s block, I venture over to StumbleUpon to see if anything jumps out at me that can spark my writing. Today, I got what I needed: a page from Temple University with a quote that began “Progress doesn’t just happen.” How true is that, really? In any aspect of our lives, progress doesn’t just HAPPEN. There needs to be a spark, something that pushes us along, ignites the way.

We can look at this in any aspect of our lives. Take, for instance, my writing. Progress doesn’t just happen. I’ve been writing for years, and years, and years. Over those years, I’ve become a better writer, more confident in my abilities. In driving, progress doesn’t just happen – it’s simple, but it requires some gas, a foot on the pedal, and a functioning vehicle to get us wherever it is we’re going.

The same is true of life. Progress doesn’t just happen. It requires hard work, determination, and a can-do attitude. You won’t get anywhere if you’re just standing in one place; you’ve got to move, to better yourself, and too keep going, no matter what.

That’s how I’ve gotten to where I am today. Do you think two years ago, when I was in probably some of the worst mental shape of my life, I would’ve ever been able to see myself where I am right now? No way. Today, I’m something I call “happy.” I feel more confident in myself. I’m enjoying life, and I can see a great potential in the future, too. It wasn’t an easy road to get here, but I did – with some hard work on my part, determination to see better days, and a strong refusal to give up.

I guess in the end, I feel like I’m ranting right now, but my point is this – in whatever you do in life, keep going. Progress doesn’t just happen; you have to work for it, but if you do, good things will come.

Posted in A Better You, Social Issues

How To Help: National Suicide Prevention Week

Posted on by melissaburgess

Yesterday, September 10th, marked World Suicide Prevention Day, and all this week is considered National Suicide Prevention Week in the United States. While it’s astounding to me that we need to designate specific dates or weeks for these initiatives – shouldn’t every day be World Suicide Prevention Day? – I can understand specifying a date/week to focus on awareness of this issue.

According to the American Association of Suicidology, approximately one million people die each year worldwide from suicide. That’s one suicide every 40 seconds. The association also says that for every completed suicide, there are estimated 10-20 attempts.

This is an issue that affects everyone, worldwide.

That’s the thing about mental illness- it doesn’t discriminate. Whether you’re poor, middle-class, or the richest man on Earth; whether you’re homeless or have a fancy home with seven bedrooms; whether you have a job or not, have kids or not, have a significant other or not. Regardless of class, gender, race, sexual orientation, upbringing or any other factor you can think of – mental illness does not discriminate, and it can affect anyone.

By this point, you’re probably thinking: Well, how can I help? An issue this national, this global, may seem like a huge task, but everyone can help end the stigma that surrounds mental illness and allow people to feel comfortable talking about their thoughts. Mental health is an important aspect of our daily lives, just as important as our physical health, and it should be treated as such, both in the good times and the bad times.

Did you know that more people in the United States die each year from suicide than from homicide?

So… what can you do?

Help yourself, then help others. Don’t be afraid to ask for help if you’re struggling, whether that’s help from a friend or family member or a professional. It’s easy to hide within yourself and not reach out, but I promise you, things can get better. Don’t ever give up hope. As someone who has dealt with mental health issues in the past, I know it isn’t easy. I know it’s scary and may seem ridiculously intimidating to approach someone about your problems. I know you may not feel “worth it” or “important.” You are. I love you, lots of other people love you, and life can be an amazing thing, but you have to stick around to see it.

Be willing to listen to others, and don’t be afraid to approach someone if you feel like they may be in danger. Don’t isolate yourself and don’t isolate others who may be feeling that way. Mental illness has a stigma attached to it, but we can end that.

For more information, check out the links for further reading below.

Posted in A Better You, Food, Health & Fitness

The Path to “Zen”

Posted on by melissaburgess

The way our lives are today, it’s so easy to get caught up in the stress of everything. We have to think about so many things at any point in time. Paying the bills, getting to work on time, what’s for dinner tonight, the weekend plans, why hasn’t that person called me back?, etc. etc. — all thoughts that cross into our heads, sometimes all at once. It’s easy for our heads to feel like we’re swimming and for some reason, we can never break the surface. But it’s time to let go of all that and get ourselves on the path to “zen.”

This isn’t a topic that I’m too familiar with, I’ll be the first to admit that. But it’s a path that I want my life to be on – peaceful, calm, destressed. Seriously, how great does that sound? I just picked up a book called “Being zen : bringing meditation to life” by Ezra Bayda (published in 2002). I haven’t started reading it yet, but I think it sounds great. Detaching yourself from the stressful situations and letting life work out things for itself, staying calm and keeping yourself centered.

I used to stress over everything. I used to worry about everything, be caught up in all sorts of drama and generally, I was pretty unhappy. But the past few months have really taught me a lot about letting things go and how much that can seriously help your demeanor and attitude towards life. Being present in the moment allows me to enjoy things so much more. Not worrying about everything and trying to plan every last detail of everything has opened me up to spontaneity and adventure. Detaching myself from stressful situations has allowed me to not worry so much about those things and focus on my life and the things I can control.

I’m sure there are tons of books about “being zen” out there. Meditation, focus, being present in the moment, letting go, etc. I plan on using these tools a lot in the future, and I hope maybe you’ll consider it too. It seems like it’ll be a great way to get centered and calm and relax. Now I just have to come up with a mantra for myself for those times when things do get in the way — but I’ll work on it.

Posted in A Better You

I Really Don’t Know How to Title This…. on Closure, etc.

Posted on by melissaburgess

There are lots of things in life that aren’t fun to deal with.

Spilling your coffee all over yourself when it’s barely 8 in the morning, for one. Or stepping on a piece of gum in your brand new shoes and having to miserably pull your leg away from the sidewalk like a deranged person.

Even the little things like finding that you’re just short of having enough change to pay for that coffee, so you’re forced to pull out your debit card and allow the nickels and dimes to jingle, jangle in your pocket the rest of the day. Or just missing the green light, having to suffer through an 80-plus degree day with no air conditioner, or walking outside only to have it start downpouring — and of course, you don’t have an umbrella.

But one of the things that really isn’t fun to deal with?

Missing someone, especially when you know there’s nothing you can do to get them back, and you know that you shouldn’t really want them back, anyways. It’s hard, losing a friend or a significant other. It leaves us with a sense of emptiness, as though there’s a pocket in ourselves that isn’t full.

We may not be able to put it into words, but it’s there, like a dark little abyss, and we can’t seem to figure out how to close it up.

The worst part is when you want to close it up, but you just can’t. You know that missing that person is futile, and yet, there it is: that sense of loss.

Eventually, the day comes when you think you’ve gotten over it. You think you can finally move on and stop missing that person. But then you hear that song or visit that place you both used to love, and you get a little twinge on the strings of your heart. You can feel the ache pulling in you, and you struggle against it.

You know that missing them is useless, but you do it anyways.

You might even begin to hope that they’ll return to you. You hope for an apologetic text message or an accidental run-in when you go for your mid-morning run or your afternoon coffee. You hope that you have a chance to speak to them again, to either mend the wound or finally close it.

The world keeps spinning, and not everyone comes back around. Not everyone should.

Maybe closure, not a return to normalcy, is what you really need.

The thing about life is that closure doesn’t always come, not in the way we’d like. Sometimes, things are left wide open; when that happens, you’ve got to be the one carrying the needle and thread and sewing that wound shut. It may take days, weeks, months, even years; but bit by bit,  you sew a little each day. And sometimes, something happens and the whole seam rips open and everything falls out and you’re like “WHAT THE HECK,” but you can always start sewing again.

Believe me, closure will come…. someday. For now, just keep sewing.

Posted in A Better You, Uncategorized

Your Morning Links to Brighten Your Monday

Posted on by melissaburgess

Happy Monday, everyone! Today is the beginning of a new week; anything is possible today. Who knows what could happen in the next seven days? Start things off right by taking a deep breath, getting focused and preparing to charge in the week that lies ahead. Here’s some links for further reading to get you started off this week.

Angie is just four years old and she’s already making a splash on the Internet — you see, she makes dresses out of construction paper and tape. You might be envisioning some craft day horror, but these are legitimate. Many of them are modeled after high-fashion dresses seen on the runway or on red carpets, and they’re pretty amazing. Especially when you recall that she’s just FOUR YEARS OLD. [Huffington Post]

Want to get your mind going this morning? Here’s a blog post from Marc and Angel on 40 questions everyone is afraid to ask. Why not check it out and start by asking yourself even one of those questions today? Write about it. [Marc and Angel]

Anyone who’s a bit of a history nerd like me will enjoy this Soldiers and Sailors database, which contains information about those who served in the Union and Confederate armies during the Civil War. There’s all sorts of information on this website, and it’s really interesting (or at least, it is to me) to just browse through even a bit of it. [National Park Service]

Last night, the annual Tony Awards were held at Radio City Music Hall in New York City. Miss the winners? Here’s the full list, and here’s a CBS video of some of the highlights of the show.

Finally, here’s 10 infographics and cheat sheets that will make your life a little bit easier. Isn’t that handy?!

Dictionary.com’s Word of the Day: strident.

Happy Monday!