Just over a year ago, I decided to be brave, suck up any bit of courage I had, and share my store of my struggles with all you lovely Internet folk. At the time, that was arguably one of the hardest things I’ve ever done – but looking back, I’m glad that I did it. It’s been just over a year since I posted that piece about my struggles with depression, anxiety and counseling… and I thought it was time to check in, and see how this chapter of my life is going.
Category: Food, Health & Fitness
The Path to “Zen”
The way our lives are today, it’s so easy to get caught up in the stress of everything. We have to think about so many things at any point in time. Paying the bills, getting to work on time, what’s for dinner tonight, the weekend plans, why hasn’t that person called me back?, etc. etc. — all thoughts that cross into our heads, sometimes all at once. It’s easy for our heads to feel like we’re swimming and for some reason, we can never break the surface. But it’s time to let go of all that and get ourselves on the path to “zen.”
This isn’t a topic that I’m too familiar with, I’ll be the first to admit that. But it’s a path that I want my life to be on – peaceful, calm, destressed. Seriously, how great does that sound? I just picked up a book called “Being zen : bringing meditation to life” by Ezra Bayda (published in 2002). I haven’t started reading it yet, but I think it sounds great. Detaching yourself from the stressful situations and letting life work out things for itself, staying calm and keeping yourself centered.
I used to stress over everything. I used to worry about everything, be caught up in all sorts of drama and generally, I was pretty unhappy. But the past few months have really taught me a lot about letting things go and how much that can seriously help your demeanor and attitude towards life. Being present in the moment allows me to enjoy things so much more. Not worrying about everything and trying to plan every last detail of everything has opened me up to spontaneity and adventure. Detaching myself from stressful situations has allowed me to not worry so much about those things and focus on my life and the things I can control.
I’m sure there are tons of books about “being zen” out there. Meditation, focus, being present in the moment, letting go, etc. I plan on using these tools a lot in the future, and I hope maybe you’ll consider it too. It seems like it’ll be a great way to get centered and calm and relax. Now I just have to come up with a mantra for myself for those times when things do get in the way — but I’ll work on it.
19 Links to Celebrate Mental Health Month
Did you know that May is Mental Health Month? It’s okay if you didn’t… I wasn’t aware of it until yesterday. But I think it’s a great cause and it’s important that we dedicate not just a month to mental health, but keep it in mind (no pun intended) all year round. Mental Health Month has been celebrated in May dating all the way back to 1949! Mental health isn’t something we should only be concerned about when it gets bad. It’s something that we should always focus on. Please note, as always, that these links aren’t meant to take the place of a doctor or mental health provider. If you’re feeling suicidal or need help RIGHT NOW, please call your doctor, go to the hospital, call Crisis Services or 911. To help kick off Mental Health Month, here’s a hoard of links I’ve gathered in regards to resources, reading materials and more.
- 25 Actions to Boost Self Confidence – although there’s no shortcut to self-esteem, here’s a list of 25 suggested things you can do to help improve your self-confidence.
- 7 Cups of Tea, an online emotional support service. It’ll connect you with an active listener for free, but please note: this isn’t meant to take the place of a doctor or counselor, and if you are feeling suicidal, please call your local Crisis Services.
- Alternatives to Self-Harm – all sorts of things you can do rather than self-harm.
- Bell Let’s Talk, a Canadian initiative which aims to end the stigma surrounding mental health& encourages those who need help to seek it without fear of judgment.
- Calendar from Mental Health America for May 2014. Print it out – every day has a new tip on how to keep your mental health in tip-top shape! (PDF)
- Exercise’s other benefits – a piece from the American Psychological Association on the mental health benefits of exercise.
- Going to Therapy for the First Time? A Huffington Post guide on getting set up for counseling and what to expect at your first appointment.
- How to Protect Your Mental Health: some handy tips on protecting your emotional and mental health as well as some tips you can use to keep yourself in shape mentally.
- Meditation Tips for Beginners – one great tool to help relieve stress and keep your mind in check can be meditation. Why not give it a try and check out some of these tips?
- MentalHealth.gov, a site run by the United States Department of Health & Human Services.
- Mind Check, a Canadian organization designed to help young adults in British Columbia connect to mental health resources. Even if you’re not Canadian (or in BC), you may still find some of the resources here useful.
- NAMI, National Alliance on Mental Illness, a grassroots organization dedicated to building better lives for Americans with mental illnesses.
- NIMH, the National Institute of Mental Health, a government organization designed to transform the understanding and treatment of mental illnesses through basic and clinical research, paving the way for prevention, recovery, and cure.
- Screening tools from Mental Health America. Please note that these are not meant to be substitutions for physicians or healthcare providers and are not diagnostic instruments.
- Suicide Prevention Resource Center, the US’ only federally-supported resource center devoted to advancing the National Strategy for Suicide Prevention.
- Ten Things You Can Do for Your Mental Health, a guide from the University of Michigan.
- The Body Positive, an organization working since 1996 to encourage youth and adults alike to experience self-love.
- Top Ten Mental Health Apps – from PsychCentral, here’s some apps you can download for your devices to do everything from keeping track of your moods to providing calming tools and relaxation techniques.
- ULifeLine, an online resource designed largely for college students to aid them in finding mental health resources.
Meditation & What It Can Do For You
There are several things in life that I always swear I’m going to do more of. I’m going to do more healthy eating; I’m going to walk/run more; I’m going to get up earlier more often, etc. Another thing: meditation.
Meditation is something I learned in probably 8th grade. Our religion teacher would have us all sit in any sort of comfortable position in the classroom, she’d put on a gentle musical track behind us, and she’d be our guide, reading off what I can only assume was a book, taking us into this magical world of meditation. Despite that, meditation does not have to be a religious experience. Anyone can meditate, and it won’t cost you a dime. It’s a small, simple way to take a few minutes of your day, clear your mind and relax.
Sharing My Story
With the new year beginning just a few days ago, I’m trying to keep up with reading Demi Lovato’s book, “Staying Strong: 365 Days a Year.” It’s only a few days in, but I’m going to try. Today’s page related to reaching out to others, to help others, as Demi did in publicly discussing her struggles with issues such as self-harm, in the hope that by discussing these struggles, others who are dealing with them may be more likely to seek help or be willing to talk about their own issues. It is in this vein of thought that I decided today to sit down and write about my own experience with mental health, depression, stress, social anxiety and other issues, in the hope that maybe even just one person will read my story and be a little less afraid to seek the help they may need. I know that other people have it worse than I do; I know I have a lot to be thankful for, and my struggles have definitely taught me a lot. I never struggled with self-harm, but depression was something that plagued me for a long time. But depression doesn’t mean you always have a dark cloud over your head; sometimes it gets a little lighter and you think things are going better, until they aren’t anymore – at least, that’s what it was for me.
Whether we like to admit it or not, there is a stigma associated with mental illness. And quite frankly, having a mental illness can be embarrassing. It’s embarrassing to be unable to complete a seemingly simple task and to have to tell someone “I’m sorry, my mind was in a very bad place today and I just couldn’t handle it without breaking down.” It’s embarrassing to leave a job because of your mental or emotional state, perhaps unrelated to the job completely. So we come up with excuses, other things to tell people, lies to cover our issues and ways to get around the things that we may be struggling with. There’s also the issues that these words are thrown around so carelessly nowadays; people have one bad day and immediately say things like “Ugh, I’m depressed.” But depression is a serious issue, recurring over time and it’s not something to be taken lightly.
But none of this helps; it doesn’t address the issues, it doesn’t bring them out into the open and it further envelopes things in this stigma where many people associate mental illness with being weak, sickly, childish, etc. or allowing people to think of mental illness as something that can just be swept under the rug to be dealt with when it’s convenient. Mental illness is never convenient, but it’s something we as individuals, as communities, as a society, must deal with. Now.
This is my story, and I hope you’ll join me along the way. Though my struggles are not over – and perhaps depression and anxiety are things that I may deal with in some way every day for the rest of my life – I feel more positive, more able to cope and ready to share my story in the hope that it may help even one person somewhere in the world.
thoughts of Melissa 