Writing Prompt: Vulnerability

Is it necessary to be vulnerable if you want to become closer with someone? This week, write an essay that gives advice to those looking to be more open with the people they know. Use your personal experience to discuss whether vulnerability has helped create stronger connections, or if an alternative experience offered positive results for tighter bonds.

There is absolutely a certain degree of vulnerability that comes with getting to know people, and with being more open and honest with those you already know. In order to create stronger connections with the people in our lives, we have to be willing to actually let them in our lives.

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Time Is A Funny Thing

Lately, I’ve been thinking a lot about the concept of time.

It’s such a subjective thing, in some ways; time can mean so many different things to different people living in different circumstances.

(Photo: Giang Nguyễn / Flickr)
(Photo: Giang Nguyễn / Flickr)

For instance, I just passed my seven-year anniversary at my workplace. When I mention this milestone to others, there are often mixed reactions. Some, who have been at the workplace for 30+ years, say something like “Oh, that’s nothing!” But looking at the bigger picture, seven years is approximately 29% of my 24-year-old life – and that’s a significant portion.

Another great example of this lies in relationships. My fiancé and I were dating for roughly nine months before we moved in together. To some people, nine months may not seem like a long time, at least in terms of dating and that sort of situation.

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I Really Don’t Know How to Title This…. on Closure, etc.

There are lots of things in life that aren’t fun to deal with.

Spilling your coffee all over yourself when it’s barely 8 in the morning, for one. Or stepping on a piece of gum in your brand new shoes and having to miserably pull your leg away from the sidewalk like a deranged person.

Even the little things like finding that you’re just short of having enough change to pay for that coffee, so you’re forced to pull out your debit card and allow the nickels and dimes to jingle, jangle in your pocket the rest of the day. Or just missing the green light, having to suffer through an 80-plus degree day with no air conditioner, or walking outside only to have it start downpouring — and of course, you don’t have an umbrella.

But one of the things that really isn’t fun to deal with?

Missing someone, especially when you know there’s nothing you can do to get them back, and you know that you shouldn’t really want them back, anyways. It’s hard, losing a friend or a significant other. It leaves us with a sense of emptiness, as though there’s a pocket in ourselves that isn’t full.

We may not be able to put it into words, but it’s there, like a dark little abyss, and we can’t seem to figure out how to close it up.

The worst part is when you want to close it up, but you just can’t. You know that missing that person is futile, and yet, there it is: that sense of loss.

Eventually, the day comes when you think you’ve gotten over it. You think you can finally move on and stop missing that person. But then you hear that song or visit that place you both used to love, and you get a little twinge on the strings of your heart. You can feel the ache pulling in you, and you struggle against it.

You know that missing them is useless, but you do it anyways.

You might even begin to hope that they’ll return to you. You hope for an apologetic text message or an accidental run-in when you go for your mid-morning run or your afternoon coffee. You hope that you have a chance to speak to them again, to either mend the wound or finally close it.

The world keeps spinning, and not everyone comes back around. Not everyone should.

Maybe closure, not a return to normalcy, is what you really need.

The thing about life is that closure doesn’t always come, not in the way we’d like. Sometimes, things are left wide open; when that happens, you’ve got to be the one carrying the needle and thread and sewing that wound shut. It may take days, weeks, months, even years; but bit by bit,  you sew a little each day. And sometimes, something happens and the whole seam rips open and everything falls out and you’re like “WHAT THE HECK,” but you can always start sewing again.

Believe me, closure will come…. someday. For now, just keep sewing.