If you’re reading this, congratulations! You’re likely engaged, or at least heading toward a wedding. It will be the most incredible, beautiful day of your life. You’ll probably deal with at least some stress beforehand, but when all is said and done, you’ll get to spend a wonderful life with your partner.
That being said, here are a few things I learned along the way to help YOU relieve stress and enjoy your special day!
It’s your wedding, not anyone else’s. It’s easy to feel pressure from friends, parents, etc. They’re all likely well-meaning, but it’s your wedding day, not theirs. It’s up to you how much input you want to let others have on things like your wedding dress (Say Yes to the Dress, anyone?), food, etc. We’ve all seen that list circulating the Internet about “stupid wedding trends” or whatever, but my thought is this: DO WHAT YOU WANT. WHATEVER YOU WANT. Seriously. Whoever you want in your bridal party, invite them; and whoever you don’t, don’t. Whatever band you want to hire, go for it! Same goes for the food, the venue, the dress, and all that jazz.
Two years ago, I took the biggest risk of my life – and nothing has ever felt so right! In May 2015, I asked my then-boyfriend (now-husband) to marry me. It was awfully scary, but obviously – he said yes!
We’d been dating almost eight months. The way things were progressing, it felt right. We’d already talked about ‘forever,’ and we’d just signed a lease on our first apartment. Maybe part of it was that surreal, hopeful longing people in love have. But it felt right to me, so I went for it.
Relationships are all about what feels right for you and the other person involved. There’s no timeline I can point to that says “date for this long, engaged for this long, etc.”
Every relationship is unique, and it’s up to you & your partner to determine the course of action and what’s right for you and your journey together.
Just over seven months in, I knew I wanted to marry him. At some point, I thought about asking him… and then I thought, can I really do this? Hell, why should I have to wait for him to make the first move?
That’s part of why I’m writing this blog, two years later. When I thought of the idea, I asked around the Internet about it. Is it common/acceptable for a woman to ask a man? Today’s society is more modern and YES, it’s okay. But a lot of the relationship blogs I read were adamantly AGAINST a woman asking a man. They called it backward and said a man would feel emasculated. To hell with that. Any man who doesn’t support a strong woman making her own decisions and moves isn’t a man I’d want to marry anyway.
When I first got married, I guess some part of me knew that the question would eventually come. I wasn’t sure when, or how, or who would ask it, but I knew, sooner or later, someone would ask if (or when) we were planning to have children. We did get a few questions right off the bat – literally, just days, maybe even hours, after the I-dos… “Are you guys thinking about kids?” “Do you guys want kids?”
I roll my eyes already. We’ve barely been married a few hours, or a few days, and already, the conversation has turned to our potential parenting at some point in the future.
I want to put it straight right here, before I go any further. It is absolutely, completely okay (and awesome) if people have children right after they get married, or soon after. It’s also awesome if they have children before they get married. It’s awesome if people choose to wait. It’s awesome if people choose to never have kids. It is completely up to the couple.
And that, my friends, is where we often run into a roadblock. Having a child is probably (I assume, since I’ve never done it) one of the most incredible things you can do. But it should be your decision — not anyone else’s.
This past Friday, my husband and I celebrated our two-month wedding anniversary. While two months may not seem a lot, especially in comparison to those who have been married five, 10, even 30 or more years…. it’s not meaningless, and it means a lot to us. The past two months have been an incredible start to our journey together!
With that being said, here’s a few things I’ve learned in our two months of marital bliss.
1. Communication is key.
I mean, obviously, this is the case in ANY relationship – platonic or romantic, professional or personal. If you aren’t communicating well, it’s going to be a struggle no matter what the level of your relationship is. But that’s definitely true when it comes to marriage. Communicating your thoughts, your wishes, your hopes for the future… all important to have a successful marriage, and probably something every couple can always work on improving! Your marriage is worth investing in – so do it!
I was so excited to finally receive our first Datebox this month and, naturally, wanted to share my thoughts right here!
For those who don’t know, Datebox is a monthly ‘box’ service where, each month, you receive a “date in a box.” Each month is different, and it’s designed to get couples to go back to having “date nights,” even if you’re busy, married, have kids, etc. I thought this was such a cute idea when I stumbled upon it and just had to give it a try.