This past Friday, my husband and I celebrated our two-month wedding anniversary. While two months may not seem a lot, especially in comparison to those who have been married five, 10, even 30 or more years…. it’s not meaningless, and it means a lot to us. The past two months have been an incredible start to our journey together!
With that being said, here’s a few things I’ve learned in our two months of marital bliss.
1. Communication is key.
I mean, obviously, this is the case in ANY relationship – platonic or romantic, professional or personal. If you aren’t communicating well, it’s going to be a struggle no matter what the level of your relationship is. But that’s definitely true when it comes to marriage. Communicating your thoughts, your wishes, your hopes for the future… all important to have a successful marriage, and probably something every couple can always work on improving! Your marriage is worth investing in – so do it!
2. Whatever it is, you’re in it together now.
From the moment you say ‘I do,’ you and your spouse are a family. Whatever life throws at you from this point on, you’re in it together! And honestly – it’s pretty awesome. To have someone to share the joys of life with, and someone to help you through the difficult times. I think this whole concept of ‘family’ was something that took me a little bit to fully get. I mean, obviously after the ‘I do’s,’ I knew this whole marriage thing was legitimate — but the full realization that we were a family now, our own little family, even if it’s just the two of us — took a little longer to hit me.
3. The little moments matter…. a lot.
Sure, I love going out with my husband — to dinner, to the movies, to a sporting event, whatever. But what I love even more are the little moments that mean even more to me, like sitting down to dinner together after we’ve each had a long day at work. Even just having quiet time on the couch where we’re both reading is absolute bliss. It’s all about these little moments that, to me, really capture the love between us.
4. A lot of things change, and some things don’t.
In our case, we had already been living together for about a year before our marriage, so at least in that context, there wasn’t this huge shift after the wedding. I, for one, was a little relieved that I didn’t have to worry about packing up my entire life & moving ALONG with the stressors of the wedding at the same time! As such, a lot of things didn’t change; we’re already accustomed to the other’s habits, and it made the transition to marriage, I think, a little bit easier.
At the same time, a lot of things did change. First & foremost, we had new titles for each other: husband and wife. And being able to call him my husband just gave me this incredible sense of satisfaction and happiness. It’s hard to describe what changed there, but it was this sense of belonging and togetherness that was strengthened after the wedding. In a similar sense of togetherness, we’ve talked about our finances more and combined things like insurance (which wasn’t possible pre-wedding.)
5. People WILL ask you when you’re having kids.
Even sooner than you think, they’ll be asking. And it’s okay to say “Not yet” or “We don’t know yet.” Because marriage, in and of itself, is enough. If y’all want to have kids, awesome, go for it. If you want to adopt, go for it! If you want to adopt four puppies, DO IT. (Seriously, dogs are the best.)
But know that you don’t need anything else unless you and your spouse both want it, and you certainly don’t need to validate your marriage to anyone else by having kids or whatever. Forget what people ask; do what’s right for YOU and your marriage at the pace that YOU feel comfortable with!
And above all else — ENJOY YOUR MARRIAGE!